its a (re)start

I have returned. My friend Kellie has inspired me to resurect my blog...I always have things to say, but never seem to find the time to craft an entry. Over the last week, I've thought up a couple dozen entries...and I realize that I like thinking about my life in titles for blog entries. You know, those clever little quips that summarize the entry and beckon the reader to read on. I have so much fun coming up with them for the happenings in my life. In lieu of a daily journal, or even a once-in-awhile blog, it would be fun to just create a list of titles, wouldn't it?

Anyway, my latest news to share is my new baby girl, Hazel. What a darling! At four months now, she is smiling, loving, rolling, crying, eating cereal, napping, watching TV, and generally adding joy to our lives. I've had to restart motherhood at the beginning again. Its been awhile since I had a baby...my Violet is turning 6 in a few days and my Calvin will be turning 4 in February. I'm older this time and less concerned with following all do's and don'ts...I've convinced myself that I don't need that this time around. I do notice that I seem to lock away every treasured moment of her infancy in a special place. She will be my last...and knowing that makes me sad and forces me to savor her in a way I didn't with Vi and Cal.

Beautiful Hazel

So, now my life has become quite a dramedy...trying to keep up with all my responsibilities. At any given moment >=1 of them wants something. I am thankful that I have a partner in life to deal with all their wants and needs...and to share in the happiness and joy they bring. The business is sometimes more than we can handle, though. We both work...a lot...and the kids need our help to stay occupied...constantly. We feel like we aren't doing enough for them and we watch as the things WE want to do pile up around us. I can't tell you the last time I scrapbooked...or spent some time knitting...and Marc's garden this year was...well, let's just say he can do better. And, of course, we've had to give up "us" time...we're lucky if we can share a conversation before we fall asleep on the couch after they've all gone to bed. We'll comment to eachother, "This is our life, now", with a sigh and a smile. Don't get me wrong - we LOVE our life, but there is a certain amount of resignation that we've had to assume to get through the day-to-day. So we re-start ourselves each day...with a deep breath...